Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Actions have consequences? ... who knew!?

I have a pretty simple policy that does not allow me to post pictures of Perez Hilton - that also extends to Madonna and the "Two Girls One Cup" video. Pretty much in that order. Enjoy more Wonder Woman - God knows I will when I am alone.

So Perez Hilton decided it was ok to call Will.I.Am a 'faggot' - it ended with him being smacked around and that lead to the following explosion of twittering;

PerezHilton: I’m in shock. I need the police ASAP. Please come to the SoHo Metropolitan Hotel now. Please.

PerezHilton: I was assaulted by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas and his security guards. I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke.

PerezHilton: Still waiting for the police. The bleeding has stopped. I need to document this. Please, can the police come to the SoHo Met Hotel.

PerezHilton: I spoke to my lawyer. I really need to talk to the authorities. Please come to the SoHo Met Hotel. Have called the police. Need them here.

Remember this 'Fun Fact' kids - twitter is not the best way to call for help. I know that if someone whipped out their cellphone while I was kicking their ass and started typing away on their tiny qwerty keyboard while crying hysterically it would just make me want to kick them more ... hell if anything it would let me know that I had exactly infinity minutes before the police came. He might as well have tried to shine a bat-signal on a cloud with one of those keychain flashlights.

Given my knowledge of the law it is my opinion that Perez got pretty much what was coming to him. Next time I hope he gets mouthy with someone with less restraint - like Chris Brown ... I bet Rihanna is not going to be getting mouthy with him again.

On a related note - I hope that Chris Brown tries his shit on someone with less vagina then Rihanna - like Bruce Willis, or Mr. T or .... that big Transformer that turns into a spaceship or ..... well you know what the fuck I mean.

Link below because I did not make it to that 'award' show;